


For what it's worth

by paint_pigment



Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Angst, Drabble, M/M, Oneshot, Suicidal thoughts ( but he doesn't go through with it), but they do die whoops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-19
Updated: 2015-05-19
Packaged: 2018-03-31 06:28:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3967918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paint_pigment/pseuds/paint_pigment
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alternate Universe where Newton drifted with the Kaiju alone, he was not able to warn them in time and the mission failed. Newton bears the consequence of his actions for what little time they have left. Hermann tries to make the most of it with him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	For what it's worth

**Author's Note:**

> Repost from my tumblr: kaiijucutie.tumblr.com 
> 
> Feel free to request/send prompts on there!
> 
> Reviews keep me going yeah!!

“How much more of a fuck up can I be?” Newton howled as he kicked his lab chair over. He was covered in debris as the ground shook, little bits of concrete there, broken glass here. Not all of it was because of the Kaijus wreaking havoc on the city. Newton was having a little…temper tantrum? Perhaps you can call it that.

Kaijus, they work with some kind of hive mind. And perhaps drifting alone with it twice does no good to your mental health. He doesn’t want to, but he is toppling things over, breaking things, it was like he was taking orders from the hive mind as well.

But in comparison to a very, very big dinosaur monster, Newt’s damage to the lab is minute. He growled and panted heavily as he clutched his hair, preparing to rip it off at any given moment. “ Get out! Get out of my head!” Newton wailed, his fascination with kaiju long gone at this point, hating them with every vein of his body. Therefore, hating himself. The neural load proved too much for him as his body ached, the physical strain doing him no good. 

Tears rushed down his face as he laid down on the ground, his hands searching for something, anything, to end the hurt he was feeling. That’s when his hand grasped it, a shard of glass. Probably from his whole freak out in the lab. But then it didn’t matter, it was sharp, all he needed was to raise it high enough and--

“By Jove! Newton put that down! Put that down right now!” Newton dropped it on impulse, the glass cracking a bit more as he turned to look at Hermann. 

Beautiful, beautiful Hermann. His Hermann. But with every step Hermann took closer to Newton he backed away, his chest still heaving, body still aching. “St-Stay back Hermann! I-I-I’m not in the proper mind!” Hermann grimaced and kicked the shard of glass Newton tried to use with the heel of his shoe. “Clearly you aren’t if you’re thinking of killing yourself!” He retaliated and dropped to his knees to slowly approach Newton. The sudden action making his leg hurt more than it usually does. “I can’t let you do that, Newton. You can’t kill yourself.” 

“Bu-But the voices! They’re coming! What difference does it make?” Newton shook his head and gripped at the ground, he looked so scared. Hermann moved one hand forward, only a few feet away from the love of his life. “ Those it make a difference that you’re spending these last minutes with me?”

Newton gulped softly and slowly took Hermann’s hand. A silent yes. As soon as their hands touch Hermann pulled him close in an embrace, he buried his face into the crook of his neck and let out a shaky breath. “ I wish I was there, I could’ve drifted with you…You wouldn’t need to suffer alone.” Newton wrapped his arms around Hermann, just as tight. “I don’t want you to go through this…I-its only been a few hours and its maddening!” Hermann pulled away as roars were heard from the outside.

“They’re here.” Newton fumbled as his eyes jolt everywhere, wanting to run away. But Hermann’s gazed is locked on Newton. He raises a hand and forces Newton to look at him. “Newton, for what’s it worth, for all the time we have left, I love you.”

The ground rumbles and Hermann leans his head on Newton’s. “Hermann, I—“

And all at once, the shatterdome collapses on them.


End file.
